Heeb

By Shira Levine 

Crocs sales have plummeted over the past few months, notes The Jewish Community Online. Like virtually every financial institution in the U.S. it seems, Crocs in all of their water-resistant glory aren’t bringing home the bacon like they did last year. Profits are down big time from $48.5 million last year to $2.1 million this year, and the company recently laid off 75 people.

So the Messianic-minded, Jesus look-alike and former Project Runway winner Santino Rice can shut up already about wishing he’d been part of the plastic clog phenom.

"I wish I had invented Crocs because every tacky fucking American has a pair of Crocs and they can choke on them," Rice barked to me at the launch party for WSJ The Magazine. "I hate trends. There are times I see a look or an outfit that is being revisited that I like. But it’s usually something that I already thought of, and I am pissed that I didn’t do it."

Check out what else our favorite outspoken former Project Runway star had to grumble about.

Let’s be honest here. You started the whole catchphrasing trend that now seems essential to Tim Gunn and Project Runway.

I made Tim Gunn a star. Tim Gunn is a star now. It’s due to the fact that I parodied him and I pointed out to the whole world that this guy is so amazing and intellectual, and he uses these three dollar words. Now when he says those catchphrases, people think of me saying those catchphrases. He’s the straightest gay man I know. He was the straight man and I was the comic and that’s why it worked. We were Heckyl and Jeckyl, Abbott and Costello. I’ve got nothing but love for Tim Gunn. He is genuine.

Are you totally grossed out by the catchphrases that followed each season?

Oh, god they are soooo passe. Holla at your boy? I told Tim when we did casting for season six for Lifetime that it’s going to be bleak. I told Tim: ‘I wish you hadn’t fallen into that hole.’ It sucks to have to explain to an older white man what ‘holla at your boy‘ means. I had to tell him that that phrase is from 1985 and not to ever use it. We saw a lot of people come in that had their own catchphrases already. One guy kept saying: ‘It’s all good in hood!’; I told Tim, ‘There you go. There’s next season’s catchphrase! ‘It’s all good in the hood.’ That is as fucking lame as it gets so you should do that next season.’ There are plenty of 15-year-olds who have not heard ‘It’s all good in the hood.’ Just fucking rock that until the wheels fall off. And that is why I watch Gossip Girl. Watching Gossip Girl is like watching 21 Jump Street. You see all these future stars in the making. All those fucking kids are going to be huge superstars. I can read the future. I am a fashion designer.

Is it true there were a legion of haters who wanted to crucify you after Project Runway?

People loved me or they really fucking hated me. The reality is people sent me death threats. The kind of people that loved me are always people who are educated, they’re always worldly. There is a phrase in the fashion industry that is paramount when someone tells you: ‘You get it.’ If you ‘get it’ then you got me. People who don’t get it and have a stick up their ass and are full of shit, who told me I was vulgar when I said my mom ‘is the shit’ and asked ‘How can he say that?’ You know what? My mom is the shit and if you don’t get what I mean then fuck you.

Sooooo dearest readers, the burning question remains: Will the cast of Gossip Girl be the next 21 Jump Street? Is Penn Badgley the next Johnny Depp?! OMFG! WTFC?