Heeb

Over the weekend, the world’s first 24-hour Jewish television network, Jewish Life Television, was launched into over 100 million homes worldwide. This came as somewhat of a surprise to me as I was under the impression that there already was Jewish television—I believe it’s called "television."

Still, curious what JLTV programming would be like, I went to their webpage and that’s where I found the most annoying person ever to live. His name is Ben Aaron and he hosts JLTV’s “Hollywood minute.” After watching the video of this smarmy bastard, I actually found a layer of viscous substance on my computer screen, which had not previously been there—such is his power.

Aaron reminds me of the villain from every college movie you’ve ever seen. He also has the Jewish Eddie Haskell going on. I can easily imagine him endearing himself to my grandmother and getting her to edge me out of her will, all while making obscene gestures at me from behind my grandmother’s back. I could go on but I think it’s better if you see for yourself. I actually suggest watching twice as it’s pretty much impossible to pick up all Aaron’s annoying affectations in just one viewing.