Heeb

Here’s a little recap: During her Barbara Walters interview last week, Sarah Palin called out President Obama for criticizing Israeli settlements because “more and more Jewish people will be flocking to Israel in the days and weeks and months ahead.” (And when you hear a right-wing Christian talk about Jews “flocking” to Israel, you know what that means: the Rapture. Yes, that magical time when God’s best-loved children — and that don’t mean you, Jew — are lifted up to Heaven while the rest of us act out the Left Behind novels.)

J-Street’s Executive Director Jeremy Ben-Ami accused Palin of pandering to “her right-wing base,” i.e., red state, Christian religious nutjobs. This set off the ADL’s Abe Foxman who wants all the support for Israel he can get. Foxman used the moment to jump all over J-Street, taking the offensive in the ongoing battle for Jewish souls (and donations). He called out J-Street for its criticism of Israel’s invasion of Gaza, its opposition to the new Iran sanctions, and the fact that it didn’t even support last month’s congressional resolution condemning the Goldstone report. Foxman asks, just how pro-Israel is J-Street? Bel-Ami responds with a polite, bitchy, passive-agressive open letter. "You have no right to decide who is and is not pro-Israel based on whether they agree with your views," he jabs.

Foxman claws at opponent.

Ben-Ami pokes back.

And it goes beyond Jewish in-fighting. New York Times columnist Frank Rich just wrote a long-ass piece on the new Palin phenomenon, including the Israel/Rapture bit. Saturday Night Live thinks her future presidency is actually the cause of the 2012 apocalypse. And while other politicians scurry at her power and the media attempts to analyze her as a social phenomenon, who can stop her? Only fledgling porn star Levi Johnston. He claims he’s in on all the dirty secrets and could take her down if he liked. And it looks like he’s not bluffing. Not known for playing nice, Palin’s lately been using kid gloves when talking about her daughter’s baby daddy. “You want to bring him back into the fold,” she told Oprah Winfrey.

“She’s being smart,” says Johnston. “She knows what I got on her.”

Could Levi Johnston stop Palin before she destroys the world? Save us, Levi! You’re our only hope.

Levi Johnston, savior of the Jews?