Heeb

Looks like everyone’s favorite film director/sexual predator Roman Polanski is about to make bail. Though currently locked up, the director of The Pianist, Rosemary’s Baby and Chinatown will soon be relaxing at his Swiss chalet with his own personal electronic monitoring device. He’ll just have to pony up a $4.5 million bail to the Swiss court first. (They are so practical about money.) Let’s hope some paparazzi snaps a photo of Polanski with his ankle bracelet. Criminals always looks so funny and ashamed in those things, like dogs wearing medical cones.

Again, everyone’s shocked at the number of celebrities petitioning for his release. But take a closer look at that list. Yes, there are a few pillars of society defending Polanski, like Woody Allen (who no-one would ever suspect of sexual deviance). The majority, however, are just a bunch of French people you’ve never heard of who think fifteen is a terrific age of consent. Don’t forget about French Culture Minister Frederic Mitterrand, who passionately defended Polanski. His 2005 memoir, The Bad Life, describes his fun-filled trips to Thailand when "got into the habit of paying for boys."