Heeb

For the past month or so, I’ve been pretty obsessed with Chatroulette.com, and I’m not the only one. The site that randomly assigns you to a chat partner by way of web cam is visited frequently by derelict esteemed colleagues, tweeny movie stars and even bigger losers (see below) who jerk it in a desperate attempt to catch a glimpse of some chick’s sweater cannons.

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Needless to say, since registration isn’t required, the site runs on anonymity — resulting in a breeding ground of possibilities for horny dudes. It’s also great place to exercise your inner mean girl by baiting sad, lonely men into showing you their goods.

The success of Chatroulette.com clearly depends on the implicit I’ll-show-you-mine-if-you-show-me-yours deal, and if your partner’s unwilling or shy, you can just click for a new one with a whole new set of genitals.

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After clicking through dozens of teenage boys up past their bedtime, I did stumble upon an old friend, Adolf Hitler. He told me a few Jewish jokes and requested to see my "Asian Jew tits." I told him to give me some Nazi dick first, but he would not comply. So typical of Hitler—just another guy who can’t get the job done.