Heeb

Anybody who’s seen the few expired condiments that make up the entire contents of Heeb publisher Joshua Neuman’s refrigerator can attest, there are times when the Fabulous Heeb Lifestyle™ leaves something to be desired. Sometimes though, we at Heeb do find a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. In this case, the rainbow in question is a flight to Israel and the pot of gold, a bevy of Israeli beauties competing to become the face of top-selling Israeli silversmiths Hazorfim’s new international campaign (we will not try to imagine what kind of weird fetishists are licking their lips over the prospect of tantalizing photographs of models and menorahs). 

And what entitles Neuman to be this warden of winsomeness?  Well, as faithful readers and part-time perverts know, long before Bar Refaeli graced the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue, she posed for the cover of the first-ever Jewish swimsuit issue created by Heeb, recognized by none other than the New York Times as “the…magazine.” Over the years, we’ve also featured such stunning sabrettes as Adi Neumann, Esti Ginsberg, Moran Atias, Neta Bell-Silver, Noa Tishby and Gal Gadot. In recognition for his years of devoted service promoting Israeli pulchritude, Neuman will fly to Israel to figure out who will follow in these models’ footsteps. Models will be solicited from the biggest agencies in Israel, but independent candidates can also be considered for the honor of being named "the new face of Hazorfim" by sending photos to publisher@heebmagazine.com.

And no, this not just an attempt to solicit pictures of hot Israeli girls, though please be aware that by sending us your pictures, you are thereby authorizing us to include you in a series of increasingly disturbing fantasies involving an American tourist’s first night on a kibbutz, a krav maga lesson that lends new meaning to the phrase “no holds barred,” and the stern, disapproving glare of Golda Meir.