Jewess

In the shiksalicious land of beauty contests, Jewish women are usually considered “too much” to claim the crown. With our crazy curls, shapely schnozes and hefty hips, the closest we’ve ever come to Barbie was Barbra. Well, a single Streisand will no longer hold it down for the sisters – we’re hereby standing up like Toucan Sam and daring the trend-spotters, “Follow my nose!” These beaks are pointing straight to the Promised Land, baby. Don’t believe it? Ask the sumptuous Semites captured here, who rock the assets once deemed liabilities—from furry pits to bulging bosoms to noses unspoiled by suspicious surgical claims (deviated septum, my ass). All respect to the mainstream beauties of the world, but we’ve got the fever for another flavor. So move over, bacon, 'cuz we’re too much of a good thing. And who can get enough of that?

ZAFTIG

Leora: I have a big butt. People can’t keep their eyes off it. Guys run into things because they’re staring so hard. Women, too. Sometimes I have to tell them, ‘Honey, this is not the meat market. This isn’t a pork chop or a steak.’ But, most of the time, the attention just makes me laugh.

Cara: I grew up in L.A. where my type of body was definitely frowned upon. It wasn’t until I got older and met a more diverse group of people that I really began to appreciate it. Society’s obsessed with small-titted, flat-assed models. I love my belly! My ex-boyfriend loved it too. He called my body ‘soft on the eyes, hard on the dick.

NERDY

Aliza: My friends say I look intellectual, but I think it’s just the glasses. They’re nerdy. But sometimes, I think they inspire people to hit on me.

DARK SKINNED

Beejhy: I'm doubly proud to be black and Jewish. I would say that I'm first Ethiopian, then Jewish, and then a woman. Most of the time when people see me reading Israeli newspapers, they’re surprised. People who have a little bit of experience with other cultures can see from the features on my face that I’m not African-American, but some people say, ‘I never heard of black Jews.’

This excerpt is from an article originally published in Heeb #3, Spring 2003.